I also know both sides and I think guidelines can go overboard, but often they are quite easy to comply with (at least my experience). I'm an assistant editor, so I don't pick any of the pieces. However, a lot of work goes into editing and proofreading them. For us, it's also immensely important that the writer has the piece published the way they want it. Our editing is more of a suggestion and fine tuning but the writer has the last say. So, at least in our case, I'd say we are considerate and forthcoming. Also, if your work was rejected, you can ask for feedback, which is something I wish more journals did.